Assimilation

Children live in an eternal present, which can be a little disconcerting for those of us who don't (anymore).

The week before last, I visited Toronto in order to re-enter the U.S. and obtain my work visa, and in some ways it felt that I had never left; five months disappeared in a flash. G and I often remark how we still feel like long-term tourists here, rather than residents.

Not so the boys. Ben, I am sure, has no recollection of Canada at this point. Sam still remembers snippets, but the memories are fading fast. Even more disturbing, he is quickly acquiring a Boston accent. For those of you who don't know, the Boston/Massachusetts accent is quite distinct—r is pronounced ah, and there's an overall drawl. It's a great accent; think Cliff Claven.

I thought I caught a snippet of it at the aquarium, a couple of months ago, when Sam pointed at the gift shop and asked: "Pat, can we go to the sto-wah?" Of course, I was horrified, and asked him "What did you say? What did you say??" and he repeated in a perfectly Canadian accent, so I wrote it off as an aberration, or the delusions of a paranoid ex-pat.

But last week I asked him how school was, and he showed me a sculpture he had crafted of cotton balls, a dixie cup, and a piece of paper. "What is that Sam?", I asked. Sam told me "Pat, it's a beyah." Before I could even begin to panic, he added: "And it's hibahnatin' in the wintah." I nearly spat up my coffee-crisp-and-maple-syrup latté.

Of course, the kids are right. Starting over inevitably means simultaneously giving up and acquiring. It's just a bit surprising to see your own kids moving on so much faster than yourself, but I have to remind myself: I am now living in a different country, I am starting to make good friends here, and I have a great job here. And one day soon, this will feel like home.

In some ways, Sam is just openly expressing the changes that we are all inevitably going through—even though some of us aren't quite ready to admit it, even to ourselves.

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P.S.—G says that I sound "depressed" in this posting. I'm not! "Still in transition" would be a better term; on the contrary, life is good these days.